Today I'm sharing about the process of how I approach re-writing your story. I've broken it down into three take action steps. And I'll share an example of how I'm working on this process in my own life right now.
Step 1. Pinpoint the old story
This sounds simple but actually can take a commitment to doing it and some dedicated energy. Find some quiet time to listen to your thoughts. What is your self talk? Try listening to common phrases you say out loud as clues to your story. Things like: This is so hard..., I could never... Ok, so one of my self-stories that does not serve me (and that feels a little scary to share right here on the interweb!) is that: People will think my business takes advantage of women going through a hardship. Eek, I said it. On to step 2.
Step 2. Re-frame it
Ask yourself if the old story is true. For me, am I trying to take advantage of people? No, in fact, quite the opposite. If you find there is some truth to the old story, look for the chink in the armor, the place where you can let the light in. When the old thought pops into your head, be ready to acknowledge it and gently move it to the side with your new self-story. There is nothing inherently bad or wrong with our old stories. We don't need to come from a place of attacking those old stories to make them go away. We need to be kind to ourselves as we work through this process.
Here's mine: My business is aligned with my values of thoughtfulness and empathy.
Step 3. Practice the new version
Now is the part when you need to get yourself to believe your new story. If your old one has been deeply embedded in your psyche, you may need lots of reminders and support here. That's ok! It's a practice. I have my new story written on a notecard on my nightstand so I see it every morning and night. Find people to surround yourself with who support your new story. I recently joined a local female entrepreneurship group and I listen to podcasts that empower me in my business like How to Be Remarkable and Being Boss. Start small, even one connection can help you put faith in your new story when your own confidence feels shaky.
I created Storytelling Sessions as a powerful way to re-write our stories of struggle. Find out more here.